A Positive Start
In just a little over a year, the MWS Family Support Programme (FSP) has helped close to 900 families build stronger relationships with their children using the Positive Parenting Program (Triple P). We speak to 2 mums to hear what they have to say.
Whether it is curfews, cell phones or conflicts, it is common knowledge that
teenagers can be hard to parent.
Just ask Heni Astuni, a mother to 2 teenage girls. She had been finding it a challenge to communicate with them because they were often glued to their electronic devices.
She had heard about the Triple P through her 13-year-old daughter’s school and decided to sign up for it as she was keen to learn how other parents were managing their children.
Triple P is ofered by MWS FSP, a service launched in October 2019 to guide individuals who need support in parenting their pre-teens and teens through the strengthening of parent-child relationships. It has since been rolled out to school leaders and key personnel from 72 schools as well as 893 families in Pasir Ris, Punggol, Tampines, Hougang, Sengkang and Serangoon.
Through 4 individual online sessions, the MWS Family Life Educators (FLEs) certified by the Ministry of Social and Family Development provided advice based on Ms Heni’s parenting needs and occasionally invited her children to join in the sessions.
Heni found the Triple P sessions useful in improving the communication with her girls and has since tried to play a more active part in their lives by listening to their struggles.
“I try my best to be close to my kids, so whenever my kids have any problems with school or friends or anybody, they will tell me first before they tell their friends,” she said.
MWS FLE Vanessa Ning also gave the thumbs up to Heni’s parenting style of building a strong relationship with her children through open communication and trust, especially with regards to their social life.
“I understand teenagers like to hang out with their friends, so I’m okay with it as long as my girls don’t mix with bad company. Most of the time, they would tell me their plans and who they’re with so that’s alright,” she explained.
While Vanessa had advised her to implement a reward system for good behaviour, Heni has since evolved it to keeping promises that she has made to her girls.
“I learnt that if my children do what we ask them to, we can give them a reward like buying them a book, and keep to our word,” she shared.
Today, Heni enjoys a better relationship with her children and has gained a deeper understanding about parenting.
I learnt that if my children do what we ask them to, we can give them a reward like buying them a book, and keep to our word.
Turning a Negative into a Positive
Another parent who has benefited from Triple P is Noor Maya Nasrom. Her 9-year-old son used to act out when he could not get what he wanted and her previous reaction was to raise her voice in anger, which made things worse.
She was also concerned that he was not coping well with the health pandemic and was stressed with having to deal with his behaviour while working from home.
MWS FLE Jencie Vijaya first worked with Maya on establishing a schedule
with her son, then moved on to equip her with skills to manage negative
emotions. Like Heni, Maya also had 4 individual online sessions.
“My main concern was my son’s studies. I told the counsellor I used a timetable, and she asked me to reinforce it and implement a reward system if he sticks to it,” she shared.
While coming up with a schedule was manageable, Maya found it difficult to control her temper when her son wanted to play games even though he had not completed his homework.
However, with Jencie’s guidance, Maya has become more patient and is now more equipped to handle her son. This has resulted in better responses from
her son and a closer parent-child bond.
“I’m very grateful the programme has helped me to control my temper. I know that parenting is not easy, but we can choose to manage certain things positively to avoid setting poor examples for our children. When you have professional advice and help, you don’t feel alone in this matter.“
“I also know how to deal with my stress thanks to the counsellor’s guidance,” she said.
“I’m very grateful the programme has helped me to control my temper. I know that parenting is not easy, but we can choose to manage certain things positively to avoid setting poor examples for our children.”
